There is usually one of two responses I wait for as I sweat it out in the dentist’s chair. It’s either, “great job–no cavities!” or “this time we’ll have to replace the filling in the back, cap the molar on the side, and it’ll be a root canal for the two in the front.”
Ouch!
In celebration of Hollywood’s newest tooth flick, Novocaine (starring Steve Martin as a dentist under pressure), there were just too many fun facts about celebrity choppers on the wires lately not to pass them along.
Ben Affleck: Size matters
Armageddon director Michael Bay so desperately wanted Ben Affleck to star in the film, that he paid to have the actor’s tiny teeth capped, MTV reported.
Brendon Fraser: Too big
In Bedazzled, Fraser plays a sensitive, anxious guy who grinds his teeth. So, the make-up artists ordered up a pair of dinky dentures to fit over Fraser‘s bigger biters. Unlike Affleck‘s, though, these were temporary.
Elizabeth Taylor: Original and mounted
When actor Montgomery Clift was in a car accident, Taylor–one of his good friends–was apparently amongst the first to arrive at the scene. Noticing the man choking, Liz performed a finger sweep in Clift’s mouth only to find his two front teeth were the obstruction! Because she saved his life, Clift had the teeth mounted as a gift for Taylor.
Sam Rockwell: Rubber biscuit
As Wild Bill in the film The Green Mile, Rockwell got to wear rubber teeth, making his choppers as creepy as his character. “I thought that that was really a big comedy routine,” Rockwell told CNN.
Harrison Ford: Biting the bullet
Ford told David Letterman on Late Night about his falsies: early in his career Ford fell on a gun during a stunt for a TV appearance. Afterward, a dentist pulled two teeth.
Julia Roberts: Oscar promotes oral hygiene
Every kid in Smyrna, GA. got a tube of toothpaste from Dr. Ted Aspes when Roberts won her Oscar for Erin Brockovich. The dentist made good on his 26-year-old promise to give every child in Smyrna a free tube if they won a big prize.
Katharine Hepburn: Ivory clean
This may be just a rumor, but there is a source that says Hepburn brushed her teeth with Ivory soap to keep her smile bright!
Jack Nicholson: Teeth for sale
If you’re interested in buying Jack’s “nevermore nibblers,” they are going up for auction. The BBC reported Monday a mixture of Jack’s molars and baby teeth will be sold December 10th on a TV show. Supposedly, the star is trying to get them back. Who got (and how did they manage to get) Jack’s teeth in order to sell them in the first place?
Which amply demonstrates the moral of this story: Hold on to your biters, baby!
