[IMG:L]MONDAY, JULY 21
Heidi Fleiss: The Would-Be Madam of Crystal — 9/8c on HBO
Heidi Fleiss. As a human being, some might be reluctant to declare her the embodiment of perfection. But as the subject of documentary, she’s gold! The Would-Be Madam of Crystal isn’t so much about Fleiss’ many, many legal problems or X-rated life story but rather her unsuccessful attempt to open the first legal brothel for female clients in the small town of Crystal, Nevada. Oh yeah, and her collection of exotic birds.
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Legally Blonde the Musical: The Search for Elle Woods (Season Finale) — 10/9c on MTV (Re-Airs at 11/10c)
This show has been a must-watch all season long thanks to its endless supply of unintentional comedy. That there’s a finite premise we were supposed to be paying attention to is actually kind of a bummer. [PAGEBREAK]TUESDAY, JULY 22
How to Look Good Naked (Season Premiere) — 10/9c on Lifetime
Carson Kressley is on fire! (Pun SO not intended.) Less than a week after news broke that the former Queer Eye for the Straight Guy star would host a daytime talk show on Lifetime, the second season of his current show premieres on the same network. He’s well on his way to becoming the Ryan Seacrest of Lifetime. On tonight’s episode, Kressley is charged with the task of sprucing up a new mom’s body AND marriage. [PAGEBREAK]WEDNESDAY, JULY 23
Mind of Mencia (Season Finale) — 10:30/9:30c on Comedy Central
Forgot Mind of Mencia was still on TV, let alone wrapping up its fourth season? Well you’re not alone, but given the dearth of other options tonight and the fact that Carlos Mencia hits as much as he misses, it’s worth the half-hour, even if only on speculation.
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Buzzin’ (Series Premiere) — 10:30/9:30c on MTV
Cisco Adler (a.k.a. the Dude Mischa Barton Used to Inexplicably Date) stars in MTV’s latest reality series–the “Music Television” network launches one seemingly every week–about the supposedly comic misadventures of a Malibu rapper and his posse. It’s a damn shame that the show just barely missed out on Emmy eligibility for this year. [PAGEBREAK]THURSDAY, JULY 24
Last Comic Standing — 8/7c on NBC
The last eight comics standing travel to the Playboy mansion and mix it up with Hugh Hefner’s gals, Holly, Bridget and Kendra. Shouldn’t be too hard to make them laugh.
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MLS Soccer All-Star Game — 7/6c on ESPN
Soccer fans, you are not forgotten! [PAGEBREAK]FRIDAY, JULY 25
Dog Whisperer — 9/8c on National Geographic Channel
In this new episode, Kathy Griffin takes a break (not really) from her eponymous reality show on Bravo to seek Cesar’s help with her two untamed pooches. Sounds like more of a cross-promotion stunt than anything, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be hilarious. [PAGEBREAK]SATURDAY, JULY 26
Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert Tour (TV Debut) — 8/7c on Disney (Re-airs at 9:30/8:30c); 9/8c on Starz
If you’re a tweenage girl, tonight is like Christmas in July; if you’re the parent of a tweenage girl, however, you might wanna look into booking a hotel for the evening.
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Anaconda 3 (TV Debut) — 9/8c on Sci-Fi Channel
Just when we’d finally purged our minds of Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid, along comes the most unnecessary threequel in the brief history thereof. It’s hard to say which is more frightening–the fact that there is actually a third installment of this shouldn’t-be franchise or the fact that it stars David Hasselhoff! [PAGEBREAK]SUNDAY, JULY 27
MANDATORY VIEWING OF THE WEEK
Mad Men (Season Premiere) — 10/9c on AMC (Re-Airs at 11/10c)
And just like that, a light week of TV is vindicated by the must-see event of the summer. Whatever the reason–be it the 16 Emmy nominations announced last week, the palpable buzz leading up to this episode, or the endless critical praise–jump on the Mad Men bandwagon starting tonight. The drama series, about fictional 1960s New York City advertising agency Sterling Cooper, opens with creative director Don Draper (Jon Hamm) clashing with Herman (Mark Moses) and his wife (January Jones), for totally different reasons and under totally different circumstances.
