“You can’t make false statements. Rosie will rue the words she said. I’ll most likely sue her for making those false statements–and it’ll be fun. Rosie‘s a loser, a real loser. I look forward to taking lots of money from my nice, fat, little Rosie.”
–Donald Trump, on Rosie O’Donnell, who chastised him on The View for not firing troubled Miss USA Tara Conner
“I have a huge bonus going to my agent this year. His Christmas bonus is going to be massive.”
–Hugh Jackman plans to reward his agent for landing him parts opposite the sexy Scarlett Johansson in Scoop and The Prestige
“Girls are a lot of work. Boys, you just put a T-shirt on them and throw them out in a hail storm and say, ‘It’s Okay, it’s good for you. Go chew on that tree. Fight that coyote. With the girls it’s like, ‘Am I gaining weight?’ I’m like, ‘You’re five years old!’ It’s crazy!”
–Sylvester Stallone, father of three daughters
“I keep saying to myself, ‘Oh, God, I’m sick of playing these dark, harrowing roles. I want a big paycheck.’ So put me in some dumb romantic comedy any day.”
–Naomi Watts
“I basically want to follow in her footsteps.”
-Ali Lohan can’t wait to grow up to be just like her big sister, Lindsay
“Men must realize if they want to date me they have to do everything over the phone!”
–Jessica Simpson warns all potential suitors about the prying paparazzi
“His wedding was world news. I am so jealous of him right now! World news! Iraq and Tom.”
–Will Smith, on his friend Tom Cruise’s level of fame
“We’re just going to all hang out together, the family–though we might go party with Miss USA.”
–Ben Stiller jokes about his family’s holiday plans
“I went to see Santa Claus once; I went home and my apartment had burned down, so that was my Christmas gift that year!”
–Robert De Niro
“I didn’t have anyone to tell. The three-year-olds don’t really care.”
–Weeds star Mary-Louise Parker had a low-key celebration with her young son William when she found out she’d been nominated for a Golden Globe
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